Audience of One

I did it.  Another month of posting blogs.  It is so cool to look back on these and read what God was doing.

These were originally intended to be written as another communication device to God, but it slowly turned into something I was doing to please everyone else reading.

This blog is my way of talking to God.  He deserves all of the glory.  He is the one that was always there.  He is the one planning out my life.  I am only here to follow.  This blog is for an audience of one.

God,
Thank you for such an amazing year.  There were hard times, but your love proved greater.  I have so much to be thankful for, and I owe it all to you...even when I do not deserve it at all.  The people you have placed in my life mean the world to me and I do not want to let them go.  I have know that there will be awesome opportunities to prove your love to others this year, and I find that so exciting.  I am not anticipating...I am here participating.

I am yours!

Faithful Fridays- Just Praise God

100th Post Reflection

100 posts already?!

(Erin, I am sorry I am also acknowledging 100 posts this week! Haha.)

It is crazy to believe that I have so many posts...so many God moments...so many lessons...so much growth.  Go God!  It is so cool what God has been doing this past year.  I owe all of the credit to Him.

I originally started writing these when I was going through a tough time in my life.  It sounds lame, but when a breakup goes bad and your identity was all in that person...it is hard to find who you really are. It was then that I found my identity in Christ, again.  He swept me off my feet.  Christ told me I was worth something.  He put the nudge on me to start blogging.  I look back at posts from December and I am in awe with what God was doing.

In December I created a post about waiting...well...for a man.  I did not need a man in my life right now.  The one I wanted to turn to was God...He is still the one I want to turn to.  Well..."insert rather cute/funny story of how God put Chris in my life" and I am where I am today.  God has been taking care of our relationship more than ever.  I actually looked back at my old posts from the advice I wrote on my blog to keep myself in check as Chris and I became closer.  It is weird how God works in ways where I am even inspired by myself in these blogs.

It has been almost seven months since I first started writing.  God was really working in me...but He is also working me now...just in a different way.  I am at a different place in my relationship with God.  There are some days where I wish I was as enthusiastic as I was in the winter...but God has been doing something with me nonetheless.

I feel so blessed.  God's unconditional love is the best feeling in the world.  He has also placed so many great people to encourage me this year.

100 posts and I still have a huge adventure ahead of me with Christ.

Psalm 100: "Shout for joy to the LORD, all the earth.  Worship the LORD with gladness; come before him with joyful songs.  Know that the LORD is God.  It is he who made us, and we are his; we are his people, the sheep of his pasture.  Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name.  For the LORD is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations."

I can only imagine the great things God has in store for me this upcoming year as I grow closer to Him.  One thing I have learned is to not anticipate, but just participate :)

God is Great, I Am Willing

This is short, but I've just been praying lately that I would be open for God to give me an opportunity to reach out to people at work with my faith.  I have no idea if God has someone special in mind, or if He wants me to just be a great example to Him to everyone, but I am becoming more willing to do what He wants.  God is great, I am willing.

More God, less me.

A Destiny Planned By God

God is good....He is great!

I may find myself repeating this many times, but I am truly blessed.  The last year has been a roller coaster of emotions...but God pulled me through!  Something that He has truly blessed me with is my boyfriend, Chris.

Chris was someone that I never planned...nor expected to have in my life.  We had been friends since the first few weeks of school, but through a little nudging by us...and some friends...we were placed together.

I am not going to lie, this relationship has been so awesome.  Keeping God at the center of our relationship has really made us stronger, but has also protected us from mistakes that we do not want to get ourselves into.  Actually, things have worked out so well for us that I just keep getting closer to him.  That is not a bad thing at all...what is bad is if I do not keep my guard up and make him an idol.

It is so easy to want to just plan out my life.  I want to figure everything out...but doing that is only doubting what God's plans are for me.

Looking back at what God has done this year with other things...He has made those things better than I could ever imagine them even turning out.  This is just another thing I need to sit back and let God take over.  I am slowly becoming at peace.  It is just an exciting thing.  Putting faith in what God has for me may seem stressful at times, but it is only getting me closer to the great things He has in store for me! Only He knows what is ahead for me, and I am ok with that.

Who knows what those plans are, but I will sit back and enjoy the ride till then. Praise the Lord! :)

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to proser you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." -Jeremiah 29:11

A Stressed Mess

Stress.  It is summer and I still have the ability to gain stress...who knew?  Well...since school has not left me...I am yet again stressed out about my classes...well...class...Biology that is.

As I am extremely nervous about this next test, I have managed to gain peace.

It has become rather difficult to come up with things to praise God about when it comes to my class, but I have managed to praise God...just because.

God is going to get me through...I know it.  I am already half way done with the class...only a month left to go!

Being a student first is truly my number one priority right now...and that must be above work, and my (not so) social life.

I will be obedient...and put my full effort into this class.  It will be over before I know it.

Goal to get through my Biology class: Praise God...just because :)

A Holy Marriage

Ok, so I forgot to post yesterday...yeah.

Yesterday I had the lovely opportunity to attend a wedding.  Weddings are just so beautiful!  Something that struck me was how sacred a marriage really is.  It is not only a happy thing, but a holy thing.

Christ designed marriage from the very beginning of mankind.  He knew that Adam needed a partner to complete him and contain characteristics of God that he may not have.  With that being said, marriage allows a man and a woman to come together as one and become the couple God has designed them to be.

Now I still have to get through college before I start thinking about marriage, but it is just a fascinating thing to think about.

Till then...I am praying that God is shaping me into the wife my husband will need me to be.  Someday I will be able to show that certain kind of love to my husband that I have never been able to show/give to anyone else.

It will be so cool to someday be in a marriage that is holy.  For now, I am just a nineteen year-old college sophomore on my own path to becoming like Christ :)

Faithful Fridays- My Week

Faith Without Deeds? Yep, Dead.

"As the body without the Spirit is dead, so faith without deeds is dead." -James 2:26

Going through the book of James has really opened my eyes to what it means to be a Christian.

It is so easy to think that faith is all about what you believe.  Sure, it is so easy to be scholarly informed about the Bible's teachings, but to live it out is such a bigger concept.

Deeds do not get us into heaven, but they show that our commitment to God is a real thing.  Doing good works should not be a form of substituting for salvation, but to authenticate your faith.

This is something that has been hitting me.  It is something that I will be working on this next week.  My faith should show throughout my lifestyle.  Having faith should naturally want me to change my life to be Christ-centered.

Another thing that I need to work on is my overall relationship with Christ.  Lately other things have been large distractions from my relationship with Christ.  I want to make Him (and keep Him) the center of my life.

I do not know...this is what has been stirring up in my mind...

Till tomorrow :)

Hold Up...Wait a Minute

Hello world!

Wednesday has already come and passed.  This week has just flown by.  I am actually quite thankful of that because I appreciate the countdown to when my Biology class is going to finish up this summer.  Too bad it will not be done till the end of July...

Actually...I am extremely tired.  I have not really gotten that much time to dig into God's word today, and my body is trying to tell me to give up and try tomorrow.  I do not want my tiredness to try and justify why I am putting that off.  So...I am going to stop blogging right now and open up my Bible.

I will have a new post tomorrow :)

DTR Talk

Ahh...that feeling of being off work at night and just relaxing.  Today is definitely a day where I enjoy the relaxing!

What is even nicer is that moment when you can just stop with life and connect with God.  That is what I just got done doing.  It is nice to just reflect on my day, and listen to what Christ has to say to me.

Something that He put on my heart tonight is how I am truly growing up.  With that being said, my relationship with Christ is no longer my parents, but my own.  I am not saying that it was ever fully my parents.  I am reluctant to have grown up in a Christian home, but as I am an adult and a sophomore in college, I need to step up and take responsibility for this relationship.  

I take my relationship with other relationships seriously, but how often do I stop and realize how I am doing with my relationship with God?  Am I truly doing my full part?  God wants us to yearn for Him.  Spending time with God is probably the most important part of my day, even when I barely acknowledge it as that.

As I am preparing my way into my second year of college, I am also maturing myself to be a representative of Christ.  Ok, I may attend a Christian university, but I feel that everyone needs a reminder of Christ's love, and the lifestyle He wants us to live by.

I was reading in Matthew chapter five, and it was talking about being salt and light to the world.  I want people to look at me and notice something different about me.  I want them to see a new me...I want Christ to shine through me and be apparent to all!  

God is so great!  He accepts us and loves us even when we do not put as much into our relationship with Him as much as we could.  This summer has allowed me to notice Christ in a different perspective in my life.  He is not just loving and forgiving, but He is also who I want to strive to be like.  

Earthly distractions are so easy to get into the way of me acknowledging God all of the time.  Do I want to admit that and keep letting those distractions take over?  No way!  So God, I am giving my distractions to you.  You are who I want to live for!  

To God alone be the Glory!

Pure Michigan

What a weekend.  I cannot believe that I am back in Illinois after such a fun trip.

Michigan started off...interesting.

Friday I went to my Biology lab, got my hair cut, cashed in my paycheck, and headed to the airport.  This was my first flight going all by myself.  I was really not that worried.  I am good at figuring things out...

Well...I was on the flight on my way there.  It was great.  I wanted to spend the time on the flight studying for my Biology test, but got intimidated when the person I sat right next to was a Neurologist and was reading in this large book about brain tumors.  I felt I looked a little lame studying for my General Biology test...so I spent the hour flight looking out the window and just being in awe of God's creation.  It truly is so beautiful.

We were about to land when all of a sudden an announcement came on the plane.  Apparently in Detroit there had been a plane that took out a large portion of cement on the runway that we were supposed to land on and we did not have enough fuel to fly around until we could land on another runway.  With that being said...they were taking us to Flint, MI.  Yes, the number one dangerous city in America.  Yay!  Ok, Detroit is not that much more safe anyways, but the airport I was supposed to fly into was five minutes from my boyfriend's house.

Landing in Flint was kind of traumatic.  I felt so bad having to call my boyfriend and tell him the news. At the time, all I could do was laugh...and kind of cry.  He was sweet and drove the hour or so to pick me up, and we both arrived late to his pool party he was hosting.

That night was great with just meeting his friends and family.  It really took my mind off of my plane incident.

The next day, Chris and I got up at six in the morning to go for a run.  He had this great idea to go running around Ford Lake (yeah...named after Henry Ford...yeah...the car dude.)  We ended up going to the wrong park and a park ranger thought we were crazy, but we finally found the correct park.

We went running...I was out of shape...but we went running.  I really was not feeling good that day, but I was fighting it.  After the run we went on a pretty walk along these islands on the lake that are connected by foot bridges.  So pretty!

The day was just getting better.  We went to a few grad parties, and also went to the mall to have Chris pick out a new dress shirt.  That was an adventure...enough said. Haha. We did end up getting one for him (and he received great compliments at church the next morning...)

But back to my day...

Later that evening, my amazing boyfriend had it planned out to drive his dad's jeep and take me to the fair.  I have honestly never been to a fair that huge.  It was soooo packed!  We spent $16 on tickets, but only went on the Ferris wheel...and the guy forgot to collect our tickets for that!  It was beautiful, but with it being so crowded, it became so overwhelming to where we had to give up our tickets to someone else.

Chris and I then were able to watch a fireworks show.  So beautiful.  Enough said!

On our way home...the jeep broke down...on the highway...I was seriously thinking, "What else could go wrong?!"  But then I received this inner-peace that everything was going to be all right.  You see, Chris and I have the craziest adventures...this weekend had just added to it.  I thought this week was going to be terrible just from when I found out I would not fly into the airport I was expecting....but God took care of it.  This problem with the Jeep was fixed when his dad came to the rescue...God took care of it again!  You see, God was taking care of us this weekend from the very beginning.  It allowed me to put more trust in Him, when things do not go as expected.

The next morning I went to church with his family.  We then ate at a restaurant on a lake.  The rain started to come in...I felt like I was in a scene in The Notebook.  Maybe that was just me being a hopeless-romantic...or just reminiscing of the days at school when Chris and I would run around campus in the rain and jump in puddles...

The afternoon was relaxing.  The last few hours with Chris and his family were spent watching television, and playing croquet.

I soon had to fly back...from the correct airport!  It was also a great time to finally study for that Biology test I was putting aside.

Looking back at this weekend, it just makes me realize how God truly made this such a great trip.  Things may not had gone as planned, but they ended up working out and we had a great time.  We had waited forever to see each other, and the waiting paid off!

God blessed us with a fantastic weekend that we had patiently waited for.  In about four and a half weeks Chris will fly here.  That actually sounds like nothing compared to our last break, but yet again, this break away from each other is allowing us to focus on ourselves and what God is doing in our lives.

I cannot wait to go back to Michigan, but I am even more excited for the trip God has planned out for us when Chris arrives here :)

What a Weekend :)

I am officially back home! It was such a blessing to go on my little vacation to see Chris.

I want to write more about it, but I may wait for when I have time tomorrow since I need to go to bed...I may possibly have a Biology test at 8 tomorrow and just crammed my studying on this last flight...

What God has shown me is the true blessing of waiting. It may have been 6 1/2 weeks without seeing my boyfriend, but with reliance on God, it was so worth it when the time finally arrived. 

5 more weeks till I get to see him.  I am excited, but am again giving it to God :)

Way More God, Way less me.

Michigan. I'm here...well...I am not going to lie, the whole trip just sounds like a big piece of poop when you orginally hear everything Chris and I have gone through.  Now I apologize if you are picturing a piece of poop, but I just want to remind everyone that although things may seem bad at the time, God is right by your side. He will never leave you, nor forsake you.  Have a great weekend, everyone. I will post about my trip tomorrow :)

Faithful Fridays- TGIF

Something to Think About

Faith.  What a word.

You cannot be a true Christian without faith.  It is truly the basis of what being a Christian is.  Faith is believing in who Christ was, who Christ is today, and Christ's return.  I have been reading in the book of James the last few weeks and it has been making me think on what faith has to do in my life.

My devotional today was from Hebrews 11:1- "Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see." No I am not one to always stick with The Message version, but I really like how it was worded: "The fundamental fact of existence is that this trust in God, this faith, is the firm foundations under everything that makes life worth living.  It's our handle on what we can't see."

Faith is such a complicated, yet at the same time...simple concept to grasp.

Paul mentions faith as something that leads to salvation, but I am finding that James calls it also as an act to change your life.

Now going to a Nazarene affiliated school, I get an ear-full on the term "sanctification."  Look it up...or...I could just tell you.  Sanctification is the process of becoming holy.  You see, when we put our faith in Christ, we also make a commitment to also want to live like Christ.  With that being said, we are making ourselves set-apart from this world.  Faith is testing us to live for Christ, and remove our impurities.

James has also made me realize that as Christians, we often pick and chose what of God's laws we will follow, and which ones we ignore.  It is not like we try to do this, but James clearly states that a sin is a sin...they are all the same according to God and you must seek Him for forgiveness.

Having faith is not easy...at all.  There may be some days where it is just so hard to trust God to be right by your side...but as you strive to be like Christ and become holy, faith works hand-in-hand.

This was a good reminder :)

Just a Small Town Girl

Just a small town girl...living in an impatient world.

I live in the middle of (almost) nowhere, Illinois.  You would think my patience would be better than the busy city-folk.  Tractors going 20 mph on the highway...living in (what seems to be) the small town holy city of trains...why am I still impatient?

It all started this morning while I could not wait to get out of Biology class.  For some reason I felt as if I was going to flip out on the prof is he was going to let us out a minute or two late.  It is not like I had anything to do after that.  I had over an hour to hang out at my dad's office before I went to work anyways...

Well I went to work and...the computers/registers had crashed.  We were not even able to clock in.  While hoping I was able to leave, we cleaned (without being clocked in or open) until the computers were finally working.  Once we were able to get the computers working and open the store, the computers were running EXTREMELY slow the whole day.  Freezing computers did not make me happy working drive thru.

Then...then I was able to leave a few hours later because they did not need everyone working.  It was such a relief knowing that I could go home and pack or study.  On my way home...I got back into my angry/impatient self when I got stuck behind a line of cars with a pick-up driving 45 on the highway.

I do not need to mention how the rest of my day I struggled with impatience.  It is unnecessary.  I need to realize that I should be living by the Spirit, and one characteristic of the Spirit is patience.

Stress is not helping, but I should not use that as an excuse for my behavior.

The week is almost over, but a new day/challenge awaits for me in the morning :)

Study Break

Whoa.  Figure It Out is back on Nickelodeon again?!

Sorry.  I just now acknowledged that as I am typing this.  It is rather distracting.  I used to love that show!

These days are becoming rather routinely...and boring.  I am starting to realize what my priorities should be right now.  My Biology prof just announced that our first test is on Monday.  With that being said...I am really nervous.  I hate Biology enough, and to make the test the next morning after I come back from my mini vacation to visit my boyfriend is rather...frustrating.

I feel that God is giving me a reminder that although it is summer, I am still in class and my studies should be at the top of my priorities right now.  I do want to be able to talk to my boyfriend every night, but I am realizing that I should be studying first.  My weekend is going to be terrible if I am freaking out about this test the whole time, or blowing the studying off until I fly back.

As anxious as I may feel about leaving this weekend, I do have things to do at home first...studying deoxyribonucleic acid is one of them.  Why yes, that is the cool long way to say DNA...and why yes, I totally did look up the spelling in my notes just so I could sound cool in this blog post.  Shows how much I actually enjoy Biology...

It may stink that I have to be studying for this class that I absolutely hate, but it is helping me to not get so emotionally attached to my boyfriend.  School comes way before him, and this class is definitely reminding me.

He understands...I appreciate that.  When we are both back at school it will be the same thing all over again...except he will be the more busy one with his studies...me the communications major and him...the engineering major.

Well...I am studied up for the night.  I am ready for class tomorrow morning and ready to study away for another hour or so tomorrow...and the next day...and the...you get the picture.

Thank you God for even giving me this opportunity to take a class this summer and get it over with.  I want to take my studies seriously and continue on my journey to a career You have set out for me.  Please give me the patience even when I find it so difficult.  I know I can do all things through You who gives me strength.  I may need to be reminded that a few times, but I know you will always be there to encourage me.

It is songs like these that God offers me a reminder of getting through the days :)

Patience is Virtue (And Totally Worth It!)

4 days.  4 days. 4 days till I finally get to see my boyfriend.

I sound like typical teenage girl, but hey...it will have been 6 1/2 weeks since I have seen him.  I should feel excited to see him.

Looking back at the year, I really do not think I could have been able to handle the distance between him and I without God right by my side.  Through previous relationships, I have found myself making the other person an idol and I have been praying to God even before our relationship that I would not cling to him like with my last boyfriend.

Being honest, God set up our whole relationship.  Long (and rather quite funny) story about God placing him in my life, (you can ask me another time for the whole story...) but there has been something special about my boyfriend ever since he was put in my life. I cannot pin-point what it is about him, but it is as if God has marked Him as special.  No, not that kind of special...special for me.  I think with that I have found appreciation in him than I never thought I would.

Anyway...with God's reliance this past semester of school, I was able to rely on God and not get super emotionally attached as we part ways.

It was hard to say goodbye the day I moved out of my dorm...I am not going to lie...I fought back some tears and (miraculously) did not cry, but God was right by my side.  He still is by my side.  When I came home I had gained acceptance that I would not be seeing him for awhile, but gained patience that the waiting will be totally worth it.

So now the time is approaching.  I can finally say hello to my boyfriend...in person!

I still feel like I sound like a typical teenage girl, but what excites me the most is being able to glorify God in our relationship when we are together.  Being away from each other has allowed us to work on ourselves, and being together will help us build maturity as we strive for a relationship to glorify Him.

This weekend will be an amazing experience; I will take in every moment of it!  Having to rely on God and become patient in this circumstance has made me realize the reward in all of this.

Like I have said in other posts, this is an awkward and different summer, but God has shown me more ways to rely on Him than I have ever imagined.

As much as I want to say a prayer right now to just fast forward to Friday, I will remain patient and faithful to God that those days will come :)

I'm a Poet and Didn't Even Realize

Short post.

Haiku time!

I just love Sundays.
For to God be the glory!
Goodnight world! Bedtime.

I'm ready for this week.  Bring it! :)

Hitting the Gas with my Garmin, and God

These days are flying by! How is tomorrow already the 10th of June?!  This summer is starting to pick up so fast!

Well...back to the question...what has God been doing in my life?

Last night my family spent the night in a hotel along the Mississippi.  My family plans to go to a family reunion tomorrow in Iowa, and my dad's spontaneious self wanted to make a trip of it, so he decided to spend a night in a hotel.  I was not planning to go with them to Iowa because I had work today, but was wanting to at least spend the night with them in the hotel.  So...I drove separately knowing I would leave this morning to go right to work.  This may sound weird, (especially coming from a girl) but I love driving.

I find that driving by myself is my alone time to relax, think, and listen.  Relaxing is nice because it gives me time to be alone and take in what my day brings.  I am given the opportunity to spend time thinking about...well..only girls would understand this, but just think about whatever.  Apparently guys have the ability to have moments during the day where they just are not thinking about anything.  I have not idea how that is possible.  Girls think too much...no actually, I like thinking.  I am going to continue thinking.  Rambling is ending...now.

Out of my time driving by myself, I enjoy listening the most.  That is my time to listen to what God is telling me, and find wisdom.  I am not going to lie, getting up for my 8 am class is annoying, but I am sure loving the drive.  It allows me to wake up and prepare myself for the day.  Blasting Air-1 on the radio, and my voice belting out every song lyric makes me realize what great of a God He really is.

The Biology class I am taking may not be super thrilling, but waking up knowing I get to drive 15 min. to class and spend that time with God is fabulous.  Yes, I said it...fabulous.

You may have a special time or place where you find it is a great opportunity to connect with God.  Mine...is on the road.

It is also nice that I do not have to text and drive while talking to God ;)

That was cheezy.  I apologize. 

Nope, I do not apologize. 

Have a great weekend, everyone :)

Faithful Fridays- Quick to Listen, Slow to Speak

More God, less me

10 o'clock bedtime? Yes, the new norm for me.  Now I may be pushing it to 10:30 tonight because I have to write this and I also do not have work tomorrow.  Yes, you heard me...I do not have work tomorrow!  Pool day for sure!  Little ol' me still has Biology at 8 in the morning tomorrow.  Oh, I will be fine.  Although...I could really go for a sandwich right about now...oh...anyway.

I am getting a lot more used to the whole getting up at 6, leaving at 7:30, going to class at 8-9:40, hanging out at my dad's office till 10:45, and then working 11-6.  It may have helped that I got to leave work two hours earlier, but hey...same time...basically.  

So here I am...reflecting about my day.  It was actually a pretty good day.  God finds ways to always sneak himself in there to remind me that He is there.  Actually, God is always there.  I just often get blinded by the earthly distractions that I seem to find more important.  

This is a short blog post...I am just relieved that tomorrow is Friday.  In one week from tomorrow I am flying to Michigan to see my boyfriend who I have not seen in six weeks.  I am actually surprised we have done so well being apart.  Actually, the only explanation is our patience, discipline, and reliability on God.  He was the one that definitely got us through.  This summer is turning out far more rewarding than I would have admitted a few days ago.  

I guess what I have learned is to not take God's work in your life for granted.  It may seem stressful at times, but it is far more rewarding in the end.  On Monday I had no idea how I was going to survive school and work, but I am already getting used to it.  On the last day of school I thought it would take forever to see my boyfriend again, but the time is almost here.  Even while I was working I thought it would take forever before I would get off work, but I was able to leave early.

Sometimes I just need to not be a backseat driver, but to let God take the wheel.

More God, less me.

"He must become greater, I must become less." -John 3:30

God's Prayer Hotline (Toll-Free)

Wednesday, you had arrived and left faster than I ever had expected.  Do not get me wrong, I am very thankful of that.  Although I should not be thanking you, Wednesday, for you are only a day of the week.  I must again thank God for getting me through another day.

He is amazing, really.  Even in those times when I feel I have no way to get through, He is right by my side.  

Something that I have noticed recently is that there is a lot of prayer needed...all over.  It almost sounds overwhelming to think about, but then I get this inner peace that God is going to take care of it.  

The prayer requests do not all reflect with what is going on in my life, but with so many others.  Being honest, it is hard to focus and remember everything.  

This weekend I have decided to make a giant wall of post-its around my bedroom.  I will have a side labeled "Prayers" and a side labeled "Praises."  This will allow me to visually read and be reminded of the things I should be praying for.  As I create this wall throughout the summer, I hope to be able to move most of my prayer requests to the "Praises" side.  I am actually quite interested to look at my wall right before I head off to school in August and see everything that God has been doing this summer.

It is sometimes easy to feel like the weight of others...or even just your own life is pulling you down.  It is nice to be reminded that I can carry that weight to the Cross.  God wants us to go to Him.  He wants us to be able to be open with what is going on in our lives.

Going to God in prayer and laying down my troubles can help build faith that He is in control.  It is so easy to worry and have doubts about troubles in life, but to know that God can get you through it can help you build a stronger relationship in Him.  

You can make that decision to have complete faith in God when you first go to the foot of the Cross.

"You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." -Jeremiah 29:13

This song is not necessarily about prayer, but it is a great reminder that by going to God you have the opportunity to change and become a new creation in Him :)

Tomorrow is a New Day :)

...So this is what it is like to feel exhausted...

Today was the first day of a crazy eight weeks ahead of me.  This was my second class day for my summer biology course I am taking, but it was my first day topping it on with work.  As much as I want to complain my brains out right now, I will not.  Besides, I know I only have one brain and saying I would complain multiple brains out would be impossible....and messy.

Why am I talking about brains coming out??  I need sleep.

The tole is getting to me. I wake up, go to class, work, then begin the whole process.  I have not had an opportunity to read a book, or lay outside, or just workout.  You could say it has made me slightly depressed.

Creepy old men figuring out my name at DQ and saying extremely creepy things has also not helped.

I just need a break.

It is actually nice because I realize that this is my break time.  For the next eight hours I can sleep before I begin the cycle all over again.  Blogging helps me relax.  I often complain and get stressed about way too many things.  I actually find myself talking and complaining about it more often than I go to seek God about it.  Writing these every day helps to clear my mind and in a way...realize that God is right there by my side.

This summer may be stressful, but God is going to pull me through.  He has placed wonderful people in my life to encourage me.

I guess a problem I am also facing is that I bottle all my stress and anxiety inside...and I am starting to let it out on my boyfriend.  I feel bad.  This is not who I really am, and I do not want him to see me like this.  I guess I just spend my day putting on a smile to where I just break down at the end of the day.

Ok...ok...as I type this it sounds like I am having an extremely difficult time.  No, I am not.  I just get stressed out every couple days, and need to get my emotions out...it's what women do...right?

As I am rambling...I am finding I am losing sight of the point I was really trying to get to.

When I am getting all worked up and stressed out about life, I am doubting God's plans for me.  He does not want me sulking every night about how annoying my day was.  He wants me maturing and humbling myself for what he has in store.

I think I can go to sleep in peace now.  I just needed to write this and realize that I do need to give this to God.

Tomorrow will be a better day :)

Great Friends, Even Greater God

Yay God.

I have no other words to explain how excited I am to have an awesome Savior like He.  Last night was a well needed night.  Last night was a God night.

Yesterday started off just like any other day.  I got up...went to work...yada, yada, yada.  Actually, I was rather disappointed I had to miss church, but I knew I had my bible study to look forward to later that evening.

After work I booked it over.  Bible study was great...although I was a little distracted from just getting off work and having not eaten since 9:30 that morning...

Just being in a room with others who love to praise and serve the Lord was great.  I felt welcomed and loved.  What was even better was what happened later that night!

I planned to hang out with my best friend and catch up, but had the opportunity to also hang out with another friend who I planned to rekindle a friendship with.  I am so amazed at what God had been doing between the three of us.  He somehow called us all together to pray, encourage, and love one another.  This is exactly what I have been hoping and praying for as I have been home this summer!

Having accountability partners is very important when you are going through your walk with Christ.  It is that moment when you think you can take care of yourself when you end up messing up.  God puts people in our lives as a physical voice to help keep you on the right path.  I feel so blessed to have these girls.  I may have not gotten home till 12:30 this morning and had an 8 am class earlier, but I consider it totally worth it.

My outlook on summer has done a complete 180.  God rules.  There is no doubt about it.

I encourage anyone who is reading this to have an accountability partner.  They are very beneficial to you as you are growing.

...They may also be crazy fun and watch movies on a projector outside with you...

I made that a lot more specific than it needed to be...haha.

Anywho...Praise the Lord.

“Yours, LORD, is the greatness and the power and the glory and the majesty and the splendor, for everything in heaven and earth is yours. Yours, LORD, is the kingdom; you are exalted as head over all.” -1 Chronicles 29:11

Open Eyes, Open Mind

Three blog posts in a row?! Wow, I have not done that since...well...six months ago!  I had no intentions to be doing this, but last night I feel it was put on my heart to once again spend a month doing a blog a day.  A lot has happened in six months, but I feel that this will be good for me as I grow closer to Christ.  Actually, I am still in awe that I managed to post a blog post EVERY SINGLE DAY through the month of December.  It was great discipline and allowed that set, daily time to reflect on what God is doing in my life.  So...bring it on.  The Many Adventures of Ashley and Christ Part II is in action!

I feel that I admit this a lot, but being home has just been...awkward.  I miss my friends, my bible study, and my (do I dare say it) classes.  One thing I never really thought I would miss so much is blogging.  I miss writing down what is on my mind...I miss looking back on these posts to see what God had/has been doing in my life.  For the longest time I was doing video blogs.  It was not bad...I mean, it was fun to just...talk.  I love to write though, and spend more time on my posts....so here I am.

Wow...I did not mean to talk that much just about that...haha.

Anyways...

I will admit it.  As much as I do not sometimes feel Christ always near, I see what He has really been doing, and with that...gain faith that He truly is there...ALL OF THE TIME.

There have been so many things that have just fallen into place that I could not take any blame for besides to God.

I have been praying to have an accountability partner this summer, or at least a good group of friends who set a great example for me.  Let's just say it has been rather hard finding those friends while I have been home.  God has given me an opportunity to join a college bible study!  Man, you do not know how excited I am!  It makes me so thankful.  Another thing God has been putting on my heart is to reconnect with a friend who I have...grown apart from this year.

For the longest time I was having such bitter feelings towards this person, I will admit it.  For some reason God had to keep them on my heart and I continued to pray for them even though I did not want to...at all. I am truly thankful God kept putting them on my heart.  My heart needed some major fixing.  Being away at college helped to distract me and move on, but I was really not looking forward to coming home if we were still not on speaking terms.

Let's just say that I get to reconnect with this person this week, and I am actually very excited.  It is unlike me to hold grudges, and this reconnection will help me as I am able to show Christ's love to everyone.

I would have not had any idea about what God's plans for my life were going to be this summer, but it is rather exciting to take time to actually see what God has been doing and be open to what is ahead.

This will be a great summer...my hopes are looking a little brighter.  Thankfully, I have a God that is greater!

Savior to the Rescue!

Negativity...out the door.

Bye.  See ya.

Today is a new day and I am rather fond of beginning it on a great note.  God is big....He is awesome...He is also there...all of the time.

Last night I was facing some spiritual warfare.  The devil was attacking me, and I was letting him.  He was attempting to tell me that I am worth nothing, I am ugly, I have no friends, and I am not good at anything.  For someone who thought they were pretty strong and secure, I took it pretty hard.

Being honest, I felt distant from God.  I was letting the devil just eat at me, and tell me things that I know are not true.

I could not stay happy for the life of me.  There was this weird feeling where I just felt alone.

As for how sad I was, I felt more scared than anything.  You see, the devil tries to reach people who are drawing closer to God.  I noticed that I felt distant from God last night because I know what it is like to be close to Him.  This was my opportunity to resist the devil, and I did!

Even though that God may not be on earth to show that I am not alone, He does put people in my life for that reminder.  Last night God thankfully put someone in my life to remind me of God's awesome power and love.

I knew what I needed to do..."Devil, I do not believe you.  I do not like you, nor do I ever want to be like you.  God is bigger than you.  You lose."

Man, that felt so good to just say it out loud.

Today is a new day.  I no longer believe those negative thoughts.  If God created me for who I am, than I must be pretty special.

You are special too! Do not let the devil try and tell you that God is not around and you are mere nothing.

Again, I am posting this verse again as I reminder not only to myself, but to you who often face those negative thoughts:

"Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." -Philippians 4:8

Faithful Fridays- Welcome Summer